So, as I methodically push the Hoover Floormate and watch for crumbs to suck up, I think.
Today's Theatre of the Mind presents: How to make love last. Specifically the love I live in and with now. I love Love! And I love being in love even though I know this will not always be the case. That's the gift of having lived in a long marriage and seeing the changes that occur naturally in a relationship. Gary and I didn't have a fairy tale marriage, but it was pretty darn nice and for the most part very, very rewarding and satisfying. I can use Gary and Marsha as a model, but only to make my new marriage even better because I can never make it the same, nor would I want to. My first life was a base for me to build this one on.
Its a puzzle that many experts tackle: How do you make a loving marriage last? Some would say it can't last and its just not supposed to. Humans are not meant to be monogamous, right? Don't say that to JZ. He has a propensity for commitment. Like me, he was tested in his first marriage and he knows he can make a marriage stand the test of time. He's very patient with me and with the cycles of life. Thank goodness that I found such a sweet partner with this invaluable trait!
Whether you buy into the whole horoscope thing or not, I think some of the stuff about my 'Taurus-ness' is true. I am loyal and trustworthy. I have tenacity and I don't give up easily. I won't be giving into the throw away mentality some have concerning marriage. Being lucky enough to be married to someone IS worth hanging in there, IMO.
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I want to insert an item of import to me and JZ, since today, August 20th is his birthday. Its such a special birthday since it is the first time since he was in his twenties that he has had someone who celebrated his day of birth. That makes it a big deal for me. I want to show him how much he means to me and how his own special day is a great way to show him I love and appreciate him. For those who don't know him, here is his horoscope and it is indeed a fitting one!!
If You Were Born Today, August 20
You are a hard worker, yet you also enjoy the comforts of home and family.
Striking a balance between these two passions is important for your all-around
happiness. You don't turn to others for advice or help very readily, simply
because you find much satisfaction doing things on your own; yet you are also
highly companionable. You enjoy
conversation, friendly companionship, and a peaceful environment. You try to
avoid discord as much as you can, and due to your graciousness and gentle
manner, you usually succeed. You are
excellent at strategy. You may cling to your lifestyle and don't make changes as
readily as others. An overall feeling of stability is important to you. You are
a very ardent, charming lover, and you may be drawn to partners who are
emotional and a tad dramatic.
Happy birthday to my dearest!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~So then, how to make the reason for the marriage(that's love, of course) last?
First off, you can't think of love as a fire or flame, because flames inevitably flame out.
The fuel that feeds the flame expends itself too fast and then sputters and dies.
Nope, I think love is kept alive if you think of it kind of as the glow plug on a diesel engine. Always there, warm and ready to turn a sticky engine ignition with a chug and a roar.
Or maybe love needs to be thought of as a low watt night light. Soft, and always there to keep you from stumbling into the door frame when you get up at night to go to the bathroom.
Hmmm more along that line of thought occurs to me as I steam up doggie footprints in front of the refrigerator. I think that I need to treat our love as a string of low voltage lights illuminating the path at night. It takes a low, slow and steady feed of energy to keep these comforting warm lights glowing, but with care, the string will keep the nights lit up for years with just the right amount of light to bring a sense of well being and peace to the darkness.
Is this MY backyard you ask? Not hardly, but isn't it gorgeous? |
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